Episode 101 B

EPISODE 101
LEVEL B2

 

READING COMPREHENSION 

REGRETS                                                                                      

When people sit back (= to sit in a comfortable way to do sth else) and take stock (=to think carefully about a situation or event and form an opinion about it, so that you can decide what to do) of their lives, do they regret the things that failed, such as a romance that foundered (= to be unsuccessful), the wrong career path chosen, bad grades at school? Or do they mostly regret what they failed to try?

Failing to seize the day (= to enjoy) is the leading cause of regret in people’s lives over the long term. Regret is defined as a more or less painful emotional state of feeling sorry for misfortunes, limitations, losses, transgressions (= breaking a law or an ethical rule), shortcomings (=a fault or a failure to reach a particular standard) or mistakes. As a culture we are so afraid of regret that we often don’t even want to talk about it. We believe it will pull us down (= make us feel unhappy) the slippery slope of depression and despair. But psychologists say it is an inevitable (= impossible to avoid) fact of life. They also recognize two types of regret: Hot and Wistful. Hot regret is quick anger after discovering that you have made a mistake, like denting a car, accidentally dropping a prized vase or buying a share that suddenly plummets (= go down) in prize. Wistful (=sad and thinking about something that is impossible or in the past) regret, on the other hand, comes from having a longer range perspective. It is a bittersweet feeling that life might have been different if only certain actions had been taken. That might mean having the courage to follow a different career, gambling on starting a new business or pursuing something that appears to be a risky romance. 

 

EXERCISE 1 

Write words and expressions next to their definitions.

1. ……………………………….. = to decrease
2. ……………………………….. = it will happen sooner or later
3. ……………………………….. = melancholic
4. ……………………………….. = to be not successful
5. ……………………………….. = collect
6. ……………………………….. = a fault

 

EXERCISE 2 

Match the question halves, then answer them.

1. Why are people not keen a. be avoided in today’s world?
2. Can regret b. than wistful regret?
3. Is hot regret more significant c. to discuss regret?

 

ENGLISH IN USE  

WISH + PAST SIMPLE (states, not actions!)

expresses a wish for things  TO BE different (but not for anything TO HAPPEN)

I wish I (live) ________lived_______ in a big city. We all wish we (have) _____had__________ more money. If only I (be) _____were_________ taller, I might be better at basketball. I wish I (have) _____had___________  more free time. If only I (be) _____were___________  young again.

 

WISH + PAST PERFECT (regrets about the past)

expresses a regret about the past, or a wish that sth different HAD HAPPENED:

I wish you (tell) _______had told____________ me about the party. I would have gone. If only David (be) ________had been_____________ more careful! But he wasn’t. I wish you (tell) ________had told_______________  me about this before I booked the tickets.

 

WISH + WOULD  

(actions & changes, not states!)

expresses a wish for sth TO HAPPEN, or TO STOP happening, or for sb TO CHANGE their deliberate behaviour in the present / future (but without much hope): (often used to criticize sb or complain about sth annoying)

If only you (try) ______would try__________ to keep the place tidy. I wish you (not / wash) ________wouldn’t wash______________  your socks in the bath. I wish you (stop) _______would stop________________ looking at me like that! Tom wishes his neighbour (make) _______would make_____________ so much noise. I wish you (do) _____would do___________________  something  instead of just sitting and doing nothing!

 

EXERCISE 3

Use the verbs in the correct forms with wish structure:

 

1.I wish I ………………………. (have) my own flat now.

2. I wish you ………………….(help) me more around the house.
3. I wish I ………………………(can) spend more time with my children but I can’t.
4. I wish I ………………………(not/ leave) tomorrow.
5. I wish I …………………..(listen) to my friend’s advice last year.
6. You wish you …………….(not/ give up) your previous job.
7. I wish I …………………(know) the answer. I don’t so I can’t give you any tips.
8. I wish the weather ……………….(improve). If not, it will not be possible to go to the woods.

 

IDIOM CLOSE-UP

 

FRAME OF MIND = the way you think or feel about sth at a particular time

SIT TIGHT = stay where you are, without taking any action

 

PHRASAL VERBS CLOSE-UP

SORT YOURSELF OUT = spend time dealing with your personal problems

NARROW DOWN = make sth usually a list or choice, smaller or clearer by removing what is irrelevant or less important

 

EXERCISE 4 

Fill in the missing phrasal verbs or idioms.

 

1. Tom is going to have a lot of exams this semester. However, in his  ……………………. He may fail.
2. She came up with a plan that enabled her to solve that crime dilemma. Simply she ……………..…….the suspects to two people.
3. Why don’t you talk to a friend? It can help you to …………….. in this difficult situation.
4. Do you normally prefer taking the bull by the horns or rather …….……… and complaining?

 

NEWS

 

REGRETS IN LIFE

“There is no such thing as a life without any regrets. However, regrets can become either burdens that interfere with your present happiness and restrict your future, or motivation to move forward. If you find yourself overcome by regrets, here are some steps that should help you integrate them.

Determine what your regret really is. Do you regret something you did or something you didn’t do? Something someone else did or did not do? A circumstance beyond your control? It is important to step back from the feelings of regret and identify exactly what the regret is.

Ask for forgiveness and make amends. Apologize for any harm you may have caused others, it does not kill to ask for forgiveness so give it a go! Forgive yourself. Forgiving others will make you happier. Be compassionate toward everyone involved including yourself.

Accept the circumstances. Avoid blaming others but rather take responsibility for anything that you could have better handled.

Grieve for your regrets. When we feel regret, we re-live guilt, sadness or anger over and over again. Allowing yourself to experience these feelings fully with the intention of moving forward can help you stop revisiting them.”

GLOSSARY 

– burdens = something difficult or unpleasant that you have to deal with or worry about

– interfere = to involve yourself in a situation when your involvement is not wanted or is not helpful

– amends = corrections

– compassionate = empathic

– handle = to deal with

– re-live = to remember clearly an experience that happened in the past

 

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